To Know, and To Know (and why they aren't the same)

Once I knew, I knew.  I remember the exact moment that 'it' hit me, and there it was the rest of my life spelled out in my head, shared with him.  Yeah, we lived together for years (yes more than one) before he put a ring on it, the whole time, both of us confident in the fact that we'd picked each other forever, even through my fits of irrational thinking and emotional days of uncertainty.

But when he did put a ring on it, something changed.  A odd sense contentedness fell upon me, in a way that was so unexpected, like when you finish cleaning the entire house top to bottom and sit down and are so please, or maybe not quite like that at all.  It's hard to say.  Somehow that circular metal with a seemingly infinitely sparkly diamond so delicately set atop it made me feel, for lack of a more creative or suiting word, different.

It's not a different I could have described before it happened, mostly because how can one anticipate the feeling you'll get with something that happens once in a lifetime.   And most certainly because every girls says 'it's different', but I somehow just never believed them, until it happened to me.  Because even when we were living together and my left ring finger was left bare every day, I knew it was forever.  But there is something about knowing and knowing, if you know what I mean.

For him, I feel like it was mostly the same, because he was the know-er. And now, I will hit you with a spell of redundancy and tell you I knew too, except it all came full circle (put intended) on that day, when he confirmed my knowing.

There are such simple things that hit me every day that devour my thoughts.   Take the other day while driving when it dawned on me that next house we shop for, will be together (he bought the one we live in before I met him).  When I articulated this thought by sharing it with him in a tone that clearly communicated extreme excitement and discovery, his response was simple, "yeah, we're getting married."

Duh, I know we're getting married, but there are so many small details in life that I haven't even had time to think about.  So many in fact that when my mind finds a new one, it trips over them when they are finally found somewhere up there among all the other zillion thoughts that zoom around in that recently blonde-ified head of mine.

Sure, I've had the 'big' thoughts kids, pets, vacations, careers, retirement, becoming grandparents, the life milestones if you will, but we get to experience everything together, everything. Including epic dinner fails, ridiculous fits of laughter for no reason, unexplainable frustration, house shopping, and a infinite number of things I have yet to think of or consider.

I'm so damn excited sometimes it hurts, sometimes it's confusing, and more often than not it doesn't feel real.  But it felt very really last weekend when we took our engagement pictures, and we got a sneak peak back.

I love knowing, but even more so, I love learning, discovering, imagining, and dreaming of new things that we get to do together.  I hope our lives our filled with anything and everything that will grow us as individuals, make us stronger as a whole, and challenge us in a way that brings the ultimate satisfaction and happiness.  

5 tips for Picking Engagement Picture Outfits

So much pressure.  We have to look so in love, comfortable, and timeless.  But cheesy poses aside, the outfit picking might be the WORST part of the whole dang thing.  Or at least that how it feels right now.  I have to look attractive, and not too sexy or revealing.  The look has to be trendy, but timeless.  And I have to figure all this out by this weekend.  So I compiled a list of things I'd like my look to be. I don't want to wear something all to trendy that looks completely awful in ten years, I mean will big statement necklaces still be cool in 2024?

But back to the list:  REQUIREMENTS FOR ALL POTENTIAL CLOTHING OPTIONS
1. Attractive
2. Trendy
3. Timeless
4. Flattering
5. Apporirate

But most of what I have read about what to wear really just says, be yourself.  So I went to the mall in search of the perfect look, and sough out help in the ladies department.  My words exactly,  "I would like something flattering, shirt, or dress that is either plain color or has a simple patterned," and she returned with a black bag of a shirt and statement necklace, I almost gave up.  But instead I grabbed one my besties and hit the mall.

I ended up with this dress, this shirt, and these skinnies.  I might now wear any of it, and I might wear all of it.  Regardless I feel all fit the list above and will be great classic additions to my closet.  As per all other things awesome, these pictures are a great excuse for my recent return to blonde, a gel mani pedi, and an appointment to get make up done.  Pretty much every girls dream.

Basically, I can't wait to see how they turn out, I've been pinning for a couple weeks now of poses I like.  We'll see just how many we can make look half way decent without feeling to ridiculous and silly. 

via

P.S. If there is one thing I am certain of in all of this, it's this dress will be loved and worn for years to come.

Return to Blogworld

I thought about writing this 'I'm Back' post yesterday, but thought better of it when I realized it could be perceived as a terrible Aprils Fools joke.  Good news is, it's not.  I plan on being back to blogging!  Thanks Amanda, for calling me out! I missed you too!!!

While I've been away, I've been doing a whole slough of nothing including but not limited too attempting to grow my hair out, pinning the shizz-nit out of wedding inspirations, reading three times as many books as I did last year, watching Divergent one too many times than I probably should (for the record that's twice), traveling to see friends and family, and attempting to plan my wedding.

And while most of the blog land can do all of these things, and continue to blog regularly, I can not.  As I have proved to you for the past two and half months.  In conclusion multitasking is not a strong suit.

This weekend marks the first of the true insanity that 2014 promised upon arrival, and just when I thought I was too busy before, I signed us up to register (this list was super helpful) and have our engagement session this weekend.  Insert every tacky 'we are so in love' face and pose here, I can't wait to stare into his eyes for uncomfortably long periods of time.  Please, just let us get a handful of decent shots out of it, we need something to put on our save the dates.

Also I am back to blonde, after three months of a dirty, dishwater blonde ombre, and I swear the second those foils were in my hair I had a deep sigh of relief.  Is it just me, or is my hair supposed to grow out of my head this color? 

Please Note: The ombre was done not out of choice, but necessity.  When attempting to grow hair as long, quick, and healthy as possibly natural colors are better, cheaper (don't have to dye it as much), and healthier (due to less dye) than the blonde.  That being said there was no way I was about to let a professional photographer document my terrible sin.
 
So I'll be back tomorrow sharing some advice on what to wear during engagement photos, and probably a few other fabulous things.

Advice to for the Days Post Engagement

First and foremost. Thank you to all your love and support. I still can't believe it's real (both my life and engagement), and I've been rockin' the ring for nearly a week.  Please note this picture was taken on the day of my engagement, just before it happened, hence no ring.

A week already. Holy Blazin' Saddles. I need to get things rollin', but seriously.

So here are some words from the wise. Except I'm not 'the wise', so here are some tips on days post engagement from me.

Go ahead and call your office and let them know you won't be in for a day or two; you'll be on the phone. Those venue calls and emails may make you crazy, but are so damn necessary. Take good notes ladies. They (the venues) mean business. Also if I haven't emailed you back (that's all of you, lets be honest), it's because I've been emailing venues.  But I'm coming up for air and will be returning them shortly ;).

Remind yourself that you are not dreaming, and that the ring too is real. And then remind yourself that yes, you are in fact some one's fiance.  Because it's just plain awesome.

Your family. Don't forget about them. They all want to know and share your exciting news. Embrace the love and support they extend to you.  Then meet with them to give them your venue information (ASAP) and start making decisions; the earlier the better.

Look cute, because everyone who knows you is going to want to see the ring talk to you about the engagement, but let's not lie probably see the ring. You DON'T want to be looking a mess. I'm just sayin'.

Just smile and embrace it.  This time if never going to come again.

Also, yes catch yourself looking down at your finger for a few too many seconds, because your ring catches the light and your eye so perfectly.  There ain't nothing wrong with loving it.