I'm a Doctor (of sorts)

I might as well be a Doctor...
...thanks to the Internet

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If your anything like me, the moment you cough and aren't sick, take a serious look at the freckle on your face and you are convinced it looks different than it did yesterday, or you have bug bites in a weird pattern, you google it.

Enter WedMD.

Thanks to wed MD in the situations listed I would CONFIDENTLY diagnose myself with whooping cough, skin cancer, and bed bugs (even though your boyfriend doesn't have them).
I mean what else could it be?

 

During the course of my relationship with WedMD, I've been 'self diagnosed'
with pretty much everything and the kitchen sink.

Everyone lady has had to have had that terrible reaction to strong antibiotics, you know the
itchy kind of reaction I am talking about,  that can often be confused with symptoms of a
common STD (don't lie, you know what I am talking about).

Of course I did the only rational thing and called the advice nurse (in tears), who told me what it really was. I made me an appointment for good measure, I wanted to be confident.

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This is the dance you could have spotted me doing on the way out, despite the itchiness.
One Diflucan, and I was good; I felt victorious.
I call it the 'Great scare of '09', it was something to remember.

I'm sure this WebMD method will continue to prove me wrong in my lifetime, like next time my throat hurts, and definitely when I have children years from now (I'm not expecting), but in the mean time, I will continue to read about all my symptoms online, just so I can be sure what those Doctors are telling me is accurate.

Who else is going to check their work?

Keep Your Blonde, Blonder

I wish I were telling you the truth when I said this picture was taken today, but it wasn't

It was taken two damn weeks ago.

Roots - 5 

Kaylin - 0

How did they get so out of control?

I'm not even sure.

But in $120 dollars and 5 hours, I'll be back to blonde, 

just the way I like it.

If only I could will my hair to grow out the color I wanted it.
In efforts to combat the never ending root issue- I bought purple shampoo.
 Supposedly it will help tone the roots and keep the dyed blonde, blonder and less ashy.

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With summer on the way, and hopefully many lazy days by the lake,
the roots should be a none issue because of the sun....

or at least lets hope so.

Are you a Trendsetter?

How do you know if you're a trend setter???

Well if I know one thing, this girl right here is NOT.

There I said it, now I'll go cry in the corner.

How do I know I'm NOT a trend setter???

Well I spend hours oodeling over fashion blogs, (weird because I'm a lifestyle blogger, 

although I'd secretly love to be a fashion blogger...#agirlcandream) and I just know I'll never quite put looks together the way they do. 

(If you're wondering who they are see my current obsessions here, here, and here)

And I'm totally okay with that.

I am perfectly fine being the girl who copies outfits and crafts seen during late 

night pinning sessions, or on the blogs that I follow (cough hence the acid wash vest),

because this weekend, I was a trendsetter!

I found this lip stain (buy here) at Target, and I knew the color needed to come home with me.

And when I finally looked at the name when I got home, there it was staring me in the face.

Trendsetter

And what does my loving boyfriend have to say about this new color?

"Let's stick to the party nail."

I love him.

Happy Hump Day!!!

There's No Price Tag for Travel

 Queenstown, New Zealand circa 2010.

This weekend was a big graduation weekend, and once again I am reminded that I'm not getting any younger.  It still feels like yesterday, that I was partying four nights a week in college.

When I graduated I treated myself to a trip to visit an old roommate in New Zealand, which while ridiculously indulgent and silly, was equally flawless and rewarding.

Every year I would work my ass off, to save as much $$$ as I could, to blow a whole year of savings on (what was usually a European) summer vacation.

Germany December 2010- yes I ate that WHOLE thing!!

Though some might argue it would have been wiser (I suppose the proper word would be more wise) to save or invest the money, I but to that I say, 'whatever'.

Of all the money I spent on traveling, and trust me it's A LOT, was worth every dollar,
pound, euro,  peso, and forint.

Also if I hadn't spent that money I wouldn't have stories like losing my front tooth in Spain, hailing a Police car as a taxi cab in Florence, and being kicked out of the Vatican, and being naked in a castle.

I'm not quite sure what serious life lessons I learned traveling, based on the list above, they'd be far and few between, but if I had to list some they'd include:
 ...
 try the food,

take public transit, 
talk to the locals,
make friends in hostels,
walk the city 'til you can't walk any more, 

embrace the culture,
never (okay maybe not never, but you get the point) say no to something you've never done,

and always, always drink the beer!

 Dublin, circa 2011 - pre weight watchers

Seeking A Summer Tan

We're quickly approaching summer, and I still don't have a tan.

I had grand dreams of getting a nice tan in Brazil, but those flew out the window

 when I got a terrible sunburn on first day of the cruise, despite applying SPF 35 three times.

I guess that's just the just the Polish in me.

P.S. Vicotria Secert had a sale this weekend 7 pair for $26, I may have scored some more leopard undies, as If I needed more...okay back to my post.

But it's when I wore this shirt that I realized, it's really bad, we match.

(We as in the shirt and I)

Because as much as I don't like to admit it, I feel better with a tan.

I feel like it makes me look thinner, my teeth look whiter, my hair look blonder, which while 'cliche' helps makes me feel more attractive. Remember how I suck at sexy?
....yeah a tan helps me with that.

So now I am on the hunt for the perfect self tanner.

I've had success in the past with Tan Towels.

I wiped on the tan seen below for my brothers wedding.
Side Note: My Sister In Law is due ANY day now!!

I sprayed this tanner on in my bathroom for my NYE in Vegas

It just took too many sprays (five nights in a row) for it to look 'good' 

 

And a trip to Mexico helped my tan (this one was natural) as well.

 So I just bought these two from amazon.

here

here

I'll let you know how they go.
But anything will be an improvement.

Which self tanners have you been happy with??

Tell me, girlfriend needs to know!!!

Three Day BeeJay

Leaving you all with this little gem.

Because it's Friday, and I got nothin' else to give ya.

This is me trying to be a cheetah
#nailedit

And now on to the 'meat and potatoes' of this post.

This week I hit a milestone people, seriously.
Warning: Please sit down before reading this.

This week I marveled in the fact that my Ben and Jerry's pint lasted me three nights!!!!
(it normally only lasts me two)

(sorry you twitter followers this is old news for you)

It's amazing.
This has never happened before.

And that's all I got for you.
Go enjoy your THREE day weekend!!!

The Hypotheical 'Today'

Play along with me for a second.
Pretend like you didn't have to work today..what would you do? 
Here's my answer.
 

If I didn't have to work today... Man, that'd be great, wouldn't it??? 
(I actually really like my job, but a weekday weekend is sometimes fun!!!)

This is what I would do.

First, I'd sleep in.

And go for a run around 7am.

Then I'd take a long shower (and probably get around to shaving my legs, 

it's spring, I need to do that now, right???).

Please note, I do not look like this when I shave. 

It's not a graceful, elegant thing. At all.

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I'd probably make the bed, instead of throwing up the blanket, and tossing the pillows a the top and calling it good. And I'd probably sit, eat breakfast, and read blogs for a little longer than normal.

And then I'd go crazy.

First I'd probably stop by the Nordstrom semi-annual sale and grab this little gem. (I am thinking I might actually need this, what do you think???)

and then I'd got to Joanns to get all the fabric and notions needed for this DIY project.

I've been wanting to make these for a while.

And I am going to; I will make these.

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And I'd probably grab a Iced Green Tea Latte along the way.

Don't fear the green-ness, it's simply delicious.

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I'd come home and probably watch an episode of Real Housewives, because I am undoubtedly a episode (or two) behind.  (Gosh I love her!!!)

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And I'd have grand plans of starting the project, but that's for a Sunday when the boyfriend is laying on the couch watching TV and I need something to do, so I'd put it off, and kindle (the new word for read).

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I'd probably get lost in the book, so lost in fact that I'd fall asleep in bed with my glasses on, and my boyfriend would come in see me, and cover my toes with the blanket.

My nap would probably last an hour, and then I'd be woken up by this little wet nose to my face, hinting that she's ready to go for her walk, and I'd be excited to take her.

Then I'd get home from my walk, and my boyfriend would have dinner ready.

It'd be delicious because it's delicious, and because it's something I didn't have to make.

And then we'd sit out by the fire and drink beer and wine, and chat.

Until we were bored, or until Zoey had successfully smelled every.single.last.thing. in the backyard.

Then we'd get in bed, and watching criminal minds or modern family, but who I am trying to fool, we'd watch both, and we'd fall asleep.

It'd be delightful.

But today will be great anyways because I have 5am bootcamp, a busy day at work, 

and a ladies night (and lawrd knows those are awesome).

So I guess I don't have much to complain about.

What would you do with your Hypothetical Thursday??

Squirt, Moist, and Other Terrible Words

This morning I went to Starbucks.
I always feel indulgent (and like I'm paying too much for a drink)
when I go, among other things, but this is not important.

I asked for a non-fat, half pump, light ice vanilla latte.
(Yes I'm that yuppy that has a complicated order too).
And the women asked me how many squirts...

And I cringed.

You know those words that just give you the creepy crawly feeling?

They just sound uncomfortable in any context they are delivered in?
Yeah Squirt is one of them.

Squirt.

I am not sure why but this word just gives me the heebee jeebees.

Whenever anyone says it, I cringe.

I'm not even sure why, maybe it has something to do with this association.

If you just clicked that link, I apologize, you'll never hear that word in the same light ever again.

P.S. There is NO appropriate GIF to go with this, you should have seen the things I looked at when I typed squirt GIF into the google search bar, so NOT okay...

Moist

End of Story.

That's also an awful word.

Dress//Victoria Secret (though I don't make it look that sexy)

Chombray//Old Navy

Necklace//Target

Mucous

I mean say it to out loud right now.

Be sure you pronounce all the vowels.

Yup, it's gross too!!!

Any words make you cringe?

I'd love to hear 'em.

(I mean I don't want to hear them, but I do want to know which words bother you!)

I'm sure I haven't thought of all of 'em.

Pregnant by Association

Everyone around me is pregnant, okay maybe not anyone, but half of the blogging world, my sister in law, a good friend, my boyfriends cousin, and my boyfriends sister (yes, I'll be an Auntie twice over this year and couldn't be more excited).

...So basically everyone.

 

At My Sister In Laws Shower  

So this weekend I had another baby shower, 

and I swear if one could be pregnant by association, I would be.

You know in college when all of you are roommates, you all 'cycle' at the same time. 

Yeah if that happened with pregnancy, I'd be SOL.

 But, since that's not a thing (thank heavens), I'm not (with child).

But I am excited about all these pregnant ladies
(and all you pregnant bloggers), because they are all fabulous.

I am particularly excited for my sister in law (who is due any day now), and boyfriends sister, because it means I'll get the perks of a baby, 

without actually having one.

I'll get to spoil the kiddos rotten, return them whey they have a dirty diaper are crying,

and, and teach them all sorts of dumb useful things.

Man I can't wait for all the babies to be here!!!
Being Auntie K, is going to be so much fun.

How To Cure A Bad Day

We've all had those days.

The days where you just aren't #winning at all.

 You know when you wake up late, can't pick an outfit, are driving on empty (back your car into a pole), and forget a key ingredient at the grocery store, yup those days.

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Well here are some things that might make you feel better,
because they make me feel better.

This Face:
There is NO mood this sweet face can't change.
And you can't convince me otherwise.

A Good Work Out:

A good work out always helps me feel better.  Sometimes it's a solitary run, and sometimes in a group fitness class, either way, a good sweat is usually a good release for me.

Rockin' OUT:

Everyone has a few songs on their playlists that they LOVE to rock out to, cough Akon cough.  Sometimes this is all I need to clear my mind and let it all go. A good jam session.
This is one of my favorites. It's Akon are you surprised?

Something Sweet:

You bet there are some days where eating my sorrows away is about the only thing that makes me feel better. Vanilla with cookie dough, hard hate, rainbow sprinkles, and two peach-os is my go-to.
And by go-to I mean that's what I get every single time.

Swinging:
Go find a park and get on a swing.
It will make you feel young, wild (okay maybe not wild), and free.
It's amazing the clarity swinging will bring to your mind.

What makes you feel better?
Any good ones I should add to my list?

Happy Dance, Because I Can

It's Friday, and I don't have any serious weekend plans, except washing my car, going for a run (or two), and attending a baby shower.

Remember these cute favors from the one I hosted for my sister in law??
Oh and drinking a LOT of these.

Anyways, I'm doing a happy dance today.
But to save your sanity, I am not posting a video of my happy dance, I have NO rhythm.
It's just a picture of my smile, because I am SO HAPPY!!!
Because the photo wall in my hall is DONE.
As in all the pictures are in, frames are hung, and I can look at it and smile.

It started a few months ago when I started collecting frames.

Then I made paper cut outs of the frames with a description on each one.
Describing both the frame and the picture.
Gosh pinterest has some bright ideas....I'm usually the measure once nail twice type of gal.
But this solved the problem.

And then I layed them all out on the bed.
In the exact arrangement I wanted them in.

Not as a subtle hint (honey please hang these), but honestly because when it was all said and done it was wayyy past my bed time, so I just layed them out.

 And then I walked in the door yesterday after a long day to this.
A completed photo wall.
 And I almost died right then and there.
He hung them for me while I was at work, to make me happy.
Not because I asked him to, but because he wanted to.
I am SOOO happy about it!!! Like seriously though.

And that right there is what it's all about, doing things that will make the other happy, unsolicited. 
I'm one lucky lady, with one cute hall way.  

Excuses for Things I Own in Excess

 We all do it.

And by it, I mean all us ladies have a zillion 'things' of the same 'thing'.

Get what I am sayin' here.

Lip Gloss, Lip Stick, Lip Stain
I consistently carry 10-15 15-20 in my purse (read there is an entire make up bag dedicated to 'lip gear') and I only use two on the daily. Why - I'm not even sure, so don't ask.

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Leopard Undies

 I am a firm believer that every outfit needs some leopard, 

even if its the super sneaky Lacey Victoria secret kind...

I have 30 pairs with leopard print, okay enough about my undies.

Essie Nail Polish

 I mean I paint my nails myself 20-40 times a year I definitely need 

20+ colors to choose from right???

Especially when I get gel manicures too, perfect, that's what I thought, they are necessary.

Basic Target Tanks

 I swear when they go on sale for $5 (which happens all the time) I buy 3-4. This does not help me save money there. So now I have 15, four of which are white. In my defense
I wear them all year long, so they are justified.

Right???

Hair products

I'm no hair expert (although I do rock third day hair like a champ) but I do have my fair share of products. Basically for all the Target purchase Loreal, Pantene, and Herbal Essence products I have, I could own three to four awesome products that actually work, and that I actually use. 

Just sayin'.

 Also this GIF sums up how I feel ever single day. I wish I were better at hair!

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Shoes

or so my boyfriend would say, but we all know a girl can't ever have too many pairs so I am crossing this one off the list.

College Tees

I can't bring myself to get rid of them. I just can't. Plus I sleep in them, lounge in them, and work out on them. So it's totally worth keeping all 32 of them right? 

What's that, you told me to keep 'em, problem solved!

Happy Almost Friday.

P.S. I really want to try one (or seven) of these.

Anyone tried 'em?
I think tonight's the perfect night to try 'em.

I Went on a Date with a Girl

Exactly a week ago, I went on a blate (blog date) with Brianne.

She blogs over here, go check her out. 

 (Fair warning very cute statement necklaces, leopard, and glitter will be everywhere, consider yourself warned, one of the many reasons I knew I liked her in real life.)

It was the first blogger I was going to meet in real life, 

and it FREAKED me OUT!!!

As a random side note, this is not what I wore, but it's a cute outfit, so I knew I needed to share it!!

Texting with someone I never met, meeting for the first time;
I felt like I was actually online dating (even though I never have).
BUT in my heart, I knew we'd get along, I mean if blog was ANYTHING like she was,
we'd be as close to close friends as any two gals can get.

So she arrived first, and I walked up in my (feeling like a monster in my wedges) gave her a hug and then immediately ran to the restroom to avoid peeing myself.

Then I came back sat down and talked to an an awesome blogger I just met two seconds ago old friend, for HOURS!!!!

And this here right here ladies, reaffirms why I blog. For friends like this, for a support group, for learning new things, and teaching others, for fun, for laughter, for honesty, for comedic relief from real life, for documenting my life, and for something bigger than myself.

If you don't remember, I almost quit a few weeks ago, and sometimes feel torn about what to write, say, and share, but I now know for sure that this blogging this is REAL.  I know that the ladies of the blogs I follow are just what their blogs are (which in my heart I knew), but it's AWESOME

Jeans//Target

Wedges//Nine West via Macy's

Shirt//Francesca's

Necklace//J Crew via eBay

Watch//Michael Kors

Sunnies//JCP

I can't wait to hang out with her again.  I had so much fun, and know she'll be in my life for a while.

Also much to my relief, she said I was just like my blog looked and sounded.
And when she said that, I just took a big sigh and thought to myself, "...you've done there did it..."

It made me smile.

Thanks for such an awesome blate Brianne, I'm excited for our next adventure!

Have you been on a blate? 

How'd it go???

I'd love to hear all about it!!

I Suck at Sexy

Not so sure about all of you guys, but I suck at sexy.
I mean I suck at dressing 'sexy'.

Don't get me wrong, I've worn my share of Vegas dresses, that are tight, and short, but that's not the sexy I am talking about here.

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Dang she's stunning, I'll probably never be that sexy!!
 
This is my deal:
V necks are far and few between, my dresses (minus work ones) are mostly college left overs, and date nights often consist of Target maxis, or Jeans and a 'cute' shirt.
 

I'm the girl that searches for the three C's when I shop.
 Comfort
Convenience
and
 Cuteness

And here is why.

Being sexy isn't a size, body shape, outfit, hair color, or make up; being sexy is

being confident and comfortable in who you are, relating and radiating towards
those around you, and confronting every day with as much 'kick' as you can give it.

To me dressing sexy is: 

Feeling confident in your outfit

Loving what your wearing

Wearing something that accentuates your personality.

I feel like I do all of these things, but I'm missing something.
An element of surprise perhaps.
Something out of my comfort zone that pushes the envelope.

Anyone have a tips? 
Help me!!!

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Why Life Would be Better as a Dog

Happy Mondays ladies. I hope all you Mom's had a great mothers day.
I made breakfast for my Mom (well parents, but in honor of Mom), and I burnt the muffins.
I don't want to talk about it, it's a sensitive topic, anyways.

If you're visiting from Two Thirds Hazel, welcome, please stay a while.

If you haven't been over there yet today, check it out.
You'll see my dog being a bad ass, and jumping off a diving board.  In case you're in a hurry, and you can't click over there right now, here's proof.

And this week we taught her doggie 'scuba'. NBD. 

Anyways that's just what I've been doing in my spare time, teaching my dogs useless tricks that keep me entertained, now if only camp had taught her to empty the dishwasher, and pick up her own schadoobies.
...that'd be the day...
BUT. That's not what this post is all about, so easily distracted I tell you.

Last week I gave you a few random facts about me, now I am going to tell you why life would be better as a dog.

Everyone Would Love Me
Try to resist a dog, I'd love for you to try.  It's basically impossible. This is just not the case in people world, specifically girl world.  We can't win 'em all.  I mean I'd love to think that people either like me or love me, but I know that's not the case, call me a realist.
If I were a dog, you'd all love me, no questions asked.

I'd Never Get Tired Running
Zoey can run FOREVER without getting tired. I need this in my life. I'd be so fit and trim if this were the case, damn it must be nice Zoey.

Cuddling Would be One of my Main Activities
If you tell me you don't like cuddling, I'd probably ask what was wrong with you?  I personally love cuddling, and cuddle with Zoey as much as I can.  Basically my dog gets more cuddles (from me and my boyfriend) than anyone or animal I know, and at times I am jealous of her. Bottom line, I want all the cuddles she gets.

Mood Swings Wouldn't Exist
Dogs are Zoey is happy ALL the TIME. (I know all dogs are happy all the time, but this post is mostly about how awesome my doggie is.)

Cute-ness Would Come Naturally

I have to work to be cute, this shouldn't come as a shock to you, these outfits don't just make themselves, contrary to popular belief.  Zoey is cute all the time, all day every day.
How could you not love this face.


And I rest my case, life would clearly be easier as a dog...